The Epilogue That Made No Sense

And now for the epilogue that certainly makes no sense:

(WARNING: This story will parody the Harry Potter Epilogue!)

19 years have passed since the evil Magician was defeated.

Yes. 19 years is too long for this story, but since we’re poking fun at Harry Potter, we might as well get this out of the way now or else we’ll never see the ending.

So, here we go.

Tyler and Sadie Potter were standing at the Scich Mire train station with their children Miles, Alexander-David, and Annette Aslan. The boys were a bit excited over going to Pinecastle Academy of Magic. But Annette Aslan wasn’t very happy about it; she was 9 years old and she wanted to go to Pinecastle Academy.

“Why can’t I go to Pinecastle with Miles and Alexander-David?” she snapped at her mother.

“You’re not ready yet,” said Sadie, who still looked as radiant as the day that she first laid eyes on Tyler Potter and wanted to possess him. “You have two more years until your magic manifests inside you and the you can go.”

Annette Aslan said, “But that’s not fair, mom. I want to go now!”

At that point, Marty and Coco McGuire came with their children Marcie and Cyrus. Marcie was the same age as Alexander-David. Marty said, “I take it that things are going well with you, Ty?”

“They should be,” said Tyler.

“I don’t know,” said Coco. “Last week, Marty threw out some random news reporter who was clamoring about some online newspaper wanting to interview him or something like that.”

“I already told everyone, I’m not interested in spilling out my life story,” Marty snapped. “I have a life now. I’ve got children to raise and a marriage to maintain. People need to learn to butt out of my life! The damage has already been done, so I want nothing to do with the McGuires or the Luvannokitch families.”

“Indeed,” said Coco.

“Some things never change,” said Sadie.

Hayley and Sophia Snape also showed up with their children, saying, “Well, we’ve got one more year before we send Finley off.”

“And you’re here why?” said Sadie.

“Just to see them off, of course,” said Hayley. “You didn’t think I’d not show up, or did you?”

“No way,” said Tyler. “I mean, what’s a sendoff without the whole family seeing you off?”

While the grownups were talking, the children were staring at the train. Marcie said, “Just wait, Alex. Another hour and we’ll be off to school. Isn’t this going to be great?”

“i think so,” said Alexander-David.

“Why are you so upset, Alex?” said Marcie.

“It’s just that I’m not sure of myself,” said Alexander-David. “What if I end up in Unicornfeather instead of Phoenixhorn?”

“It’s not the end of the world if you end up in Unicornfeather,” Tyler said to Alexander-David. “I could have gone into Unicornfeather if I wanted to. I could have gone into Pixiepuffle or Dragonsting as well. But I chose to go into Phoenixhorn and while it might not have been my best choice, it was the choice that mattered. Besides, if I never went into Phoenixhorn…”

“…he would have never met me,” Sadie beamed at him.

Tyler nodded and turned to see Malcolm Dratzins, his wife, and their son Devlin coming into the train station. He then looked at Alexander-David and said, “Don’t worry too much about the Sorting Hat; sometimes, it makes choices that seem ridiculous at first, but you’ll soon grow into your new role…”

“Hey, isn’t that Trixis Wolfin kissing Pepper Snape?” cried Cyrus as he pointed to a young couple standing on the side of the ticket booth.

“Well, isn’t this nice?” said Coco. “Looks like Trixis is on his way to joining the Snape family.”

“Oh, you gotta be kidding me!” Hayley cried out. “Not my niece!”

Just then, the train whistle blew, signaling that the train would depart from the station in 30 minutes. Immediately, the families began to steer their children towards the train, dragging trunks full of magical school supplies with them. As Felicity Snape boarded the train, she caught a glimpse of Alexander-David Potter. Hayley and Tyler saw the children staring at each other and shook their heads. But nothing prepared them for the fact that Malcolm and Devlin Dratzins approached them.

“So, you decided to show up right after we kicked you out,” Marty snapped at him.

“But I had to return,” said Malcolm. “The wizarding world had requested that I return and take up my father’s post. Plus, my son Devlin was accepted into Pinecastle and I can’t just not let him go, or can I?”

“I don’t know what strings you pulled to get back here,” Hayley snapped, “but I won’t let your son near my children…”

“OK, that’s quite enough,” said Sophia. “I don’t know why you boys insist on restarting this feud, but I won’t have it.” To the children, she said, “Tell Alistair that we all said hi.”

“Alistair? you mean Professor Johnson?” said Felicity.

“Isn’t he married to Galadriel Black?” said Marcie.

“This is great!” said Alexander-David. “We’ll get to see them and the twins at Pinecastle!”

After one last goodbye, the train took off quickly, with Finley, Cyrus, and Annette Aslan chasing after it until it pulled out of the station and became a blip on the horizon. Trixis went to retrieve the children as Tyler sighed. He hoped that Alexander-David would be happy during his first term at Pinecastle Academy.

Sadie said to him, “Don’t worry, Tyler. He’s going to be fine.”

“I hope so,” Tyler said more to himself than to her. Hopefully, Headmaster Isabella Dumbledore would do a better job leading his sons than her father manipulated him.

He reached out and felt the crescent moon-shaped scar that still covered his right cheek. It had not troubled him for 19 years. All was well.

(Well, that’s how the story ends! I told you that it didn’t make sense!)