I Have Survived (Cedric Diggory/Edward Cullen parody to the tune of Gloria Gaynor’s “I Will Survive)

at first I was upset, I was frightened
I was worried about not having her by my side
and as I spent those many nights thinking about how she did me wrong
and I got pissed, and now I’m getting my revenge…

guess what, I’m back from Forks Washington
and you’re just staring at me with that stupid look upon your face
I should have quit the competition, I should have had you expelled
if I knew that I would die and then you would dare move in on my girl

and now just go, just go away
please get out of my sight, because I don’t like you anymore
you were the one who lured me to my death
you made me take Lord Voldemort‘s curse and die

oh no not I
I have survived
and I know that I don’t need magic to stay alive

I got the rest of my life to live
and I got a new family to love
I have survived, I have survived

well you think that your love story is better than mine
did you forget that once upon a time, she tried to have you killed
and instead of comforting my girl when she needed it the most
you slapped her across her face and you said I was a fool

now they see me, somebody new
not that pretty boy who wanted to be friends with you
and I don’t have the time for your stupid magic tricks
because I’m heading back to the girl who I know really loves me

and now just go, just go away
please get out of my sight, because I don’t like you anymore
you were the one who lured me to my death
you made me take Lord Voldemort’s curse and die

oh no not I
I have survived
and I know that I don’t need magic to stay alive

I got the rest of my life to live
and I got a new family to love
I have survived, I have survived

now I’m gonna go, walk out the door
and I’m not looking back, because I don’t like you anymore
you were the one who lured me to my death
you made me take Lord Voldemort’s curse and die

oh no not I
I have survived
and I know that I don’t need magic to stay alive

I got the rest of my life to live
and I got a new family to love
I have survived, I have survived

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